Kevin: "Mom, can you take a photo of me for my website?"
Me: "You really need a hair cut. Say 'cheese!' No really, smile, dammit. Not like that. Not like you are constipated. Think of girls. "
Kevin: "Uh, Mom? Why are you still taking pictures? And stop mentioning those girls I like."
Me: "Why not? You're smiling aren't you?"
Kevin: "I can NOT believe you just said THAT to get me to smile. You are SO WEIRD."
Me: "You're a guy. I knew THAT would make you laugh."