Thursday, November 06, 2008

Cookie Crumbs

Jake: "...and he irritated me so I told him to get lost. But I swore."

Scattered Mom:"...a grade11? You mouthed off a six foot tall, rowdy grade 11 who will stuff you in a garbage can without a second thought?"

Jake: "Yep."

Scattered Mom: "How stupid are you?"

Hubs (from the next room) "Is that a rhetorical question?"


********

8 year old Jake to 4 year old little girl neighbor: "Oh ya, I loved the Little Mermaid. It was my
favorite movie."

Neighbor girl blinks and her brow furrows. She pauses, looks at Jake, and then at me.

"He liked The Little Mermaid?"

Scattered Mom: "Oh yes, he loved it. Especially Sebastian the crab."

Neighbor girl looks like she can't quite comprehend this information and just maybe, her brain will explode.

"You mean, he liked Little Mermaid when he was a GIRL?"

*****
"Mom try this on." Jake produces a metal band. "I'm making you a ring, you know."

I slip the band on. It is a bit thick and uncomfortable.

Scattered Mom: "Umm...it's nice of you Jake but it's not smooth enough to be comfortable," I say while I hand it back.

Jake: "Ya I'm going to put it in my rock tumbler and get it all smoothed out."

Scattered Mom: "I thought your Dad told you that you couldn't put metal in the tumbler."

Jake: "He will after I prove it to him."

*****

End of the school day-things to do, places to go. Come on, put your stuff in the trunk.

THWACK!

Jake is doubled over-as I held up the lid of the trunk, he just walked right into it.

"Are you okay?"

"I think so...." he mumbles with his face on the carpet of the trunk, his voice thick with unshed tears. "That really hurt."

"Well sweetie, you gotta look where you're going!"

Later on we're home, and as I'm preparing dinner the phone rings. It's Jake's friend from down the street.

Jake: "No. You're kidding. The whole bus saw it? And they were laughing?"

Aw, poor kid. Three whole buses of peers saw him walk into the trunk. That has to be embarrassing....

Scattered Mom: "Hey Jake? Tomorrow if you get teased, just tell them I closed it on you. I don't mind."

Jake: "That's actually what I was planning on doing."

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