Monday, January 07, 2008

Lessons Learned From Vacation Planning

1. You have not lost your birth certificate in the entire 19 years you've had it in your possession, but when you need to fill out forms to get a passport, you discover that it eloped with your health insurance card.

Both of which are vital to get a passport. Which is vital to go on vacation to the USA.

2. You will find yourself wistfully looking at this places like this


...and drooling over the $6000 a night suite that is bigger then your house, which has hosted royalty. But...you know, we're not going to New York so that's okay. I'll just book that for next year.

3. The price of the hotel room is directly proportional to the reservation clerk's ability to speak English and knowledge of where Canada actually is. You find yourself staring at the phone in shock when you don't actually have to tell the clerk that BC is, in fact, not a US State.

4. While hotel researching online, you must resist the urge to change all the dollar amounts to "show in Canadian money" and gloat because the last time the loonie was at par with/more then the American dollar, it was the 70s, ish. You were about 7 and on vacation in Seattle, where your parents took you to see JP Patches and he kissed you and gave you carmel corn. Am I the only one a little weirded out by this?

5. You realize that all the Christmas chocolate you are eating while researching is going to make a re-appearance on thighs during your vacation in 105 C weather, and maybe you should join a gym or at least do a little walking, for goodness sake.

6. It also occurs to you that maybe you shouldn't have told the 12 year old that you're staying in Roswell, New Mexico. Now he's telling everyone that you're going "UFO hunting" while on vacation; and they think you are insane, of course. However you're not sure if they think you're insane to drive all the way to New Mexico from Canada, or that you are insane to drive from New Mexico to Canada with the 12 year old.


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