Thursday, December 28, 2006

New Year's Resolutions

Photo by Athena

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I don't usually make New Year's Resolutions, because....well...let's be honest, I don't keep 'em. I have good intentions, but no follow through skills so they usually never make it past January 31st. So I stopped trying.

However, if I could wave a magic wand and pretty much make anything happen, here's the top 10 things I would do (in no particular order)

1. Prevent my husband and son from blowing up the kitchen and/or poisoning each other with the chemistry set we so foolishly bought the child for Christmas.(because while the child is listening to the "follow the directions in the book or I will KILL YOU" instructions, the husband isn't being nearly so cautious and is scaring the crap out of me)

2. Remember to send cards to family and friends on their birthdays instead of buying the cards, writing thoughtful sentiments in them, addressing them, and losing them. Doesn't work when I find the card 4 months later. I found the anniversary card I bought John two years ago the other day. Oops.

3. Make our power lines indestructible.

4. Invent self cleaning bathrooms, or teach Jake how to clean them, at the very least.

5. Try a Starbucks Gingerbread Latte-at least I won't throw one of those.....

6. Learn to knit, and ultimately make an afghan. If I can figure it out and have time to knit instead of blog, of course.

7. Convince Britney Spears to please, please, wear underwear at all times, for God's sake.

8. Teach my child that sticks, rocks, and pine cones belong outside and not in his room, certainly not in piles under his bed where the dust bunnies make forts with them and play with the Lego people. Whereupon they all get sucked up by (and stuck in) the evil vacuum.

9. Grow some plants besides Jake's Venus fly trap without ultimately killing them.

10. Remember to give my husband many hugs and kisses because, while he spoils me rotten and is the best guy ever, he's still terrified of waking me up. In fact he's scared of me until I've had coffee.

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